Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Your Drive Home Just Got 1/4 More Tolerable

Pete Sheppard was fired today. To start off I am not a fan of WEEI. At all. I hate everything about the station from the racist douchebags Dennis and Callahan in the morning, to the Big Show where the entire cast just yells over each other. If I had my way, I would dance around and do a friggin rain dance naked in front of the station if their signal was destroyed. If you aren't familiar the show basically consists of four loud mouthed blowhards, who have some bizarre homo-erotic crush on Tom Brady, hate liberals, gays and blacks, and don't understand statistics. The show ends with the "Whiner Line" which are a group of insanely unfunny morons, who listen to these assholes on a daily basis, and make stupid quips about what happened on the show* . Sheppard is Big O's trusty sidekick, who's "MO" is that he is a stammering fat retard, that the rest of the crew beats on.

A basic Big Show consist of a conversation like this

Big O/Pete Sheppard/DeOssie/Smerlas (all at once): I just don't know about this sabermetrics/black people talk and dress funny/college sports are for commies and the French/ Liberals are a bunch of panty wearing queers.

Well 1/4 of the reason I bought Sirius/XM is leaving, too bad the rest of those clowns still have jobs. Due to the "economy" Sheppard was canned by WEEI today, and was seen leaving in a trail of bacon and jelly doughnut scented tears. I feel no pity for him, the show was about intolerable as it gets. I mean I'm all about poop and fart jokes, but not when they are told by two of the assholes that would be the type that hung me by my underwear from my locker.

"Hey Steve. Guess what I saw?"
"What Fred, a great deal on Prime Rib at our steak house?"
"No, Sheppard was taking a poop in the bathroom"
"Darhaharahar. when i played for the giants, i was most known for making poops and patting guys on the butt! duhduhduhduhddh This is why we are rated number one! Ok, let's go make out with 13 year olds"
"Pre-puberty rocks!" (smashes head into radio board)

And when the callers were put on the air the show got even better!

"Hey Big O. The Sawx have gotta go out there and make a trade."
" Well you know, they already have enough pitching."
"Yeah whatever you fat bastard. If I was Theo I would trade the Marlins, Jason Varitek, a Fenway Frank and the Dropkick Murphys for Hanley Ramirez. Oh and I'll throw in Deval Patrick"
"Caller, I understand you. Patrick is a child molester loving liberal with a flowers in his hair who hugs trees! These hippies want to take your money and legalize murder! Global warming was created by Satan and Bill Polian. I just farted! Tom Brady is the bestest quarterback in the league. Durdurdurdur."

Sheppard, best of luck to you pal. Hope you find another job somewhere else. Just not in Boston, well I got skiing up north alot, so why don't you find a job in say Chattanooga. I hear the rednecks like inane, pointless banter. And please if you are a Big Show regular listener, and all this offends you get the hell off our blog.

*To be honest though the Robert Kraft impersonator is REALLY funny.


GHABB,Y~! said...

If he actually ends up in Chattanooga, I will kill you in cold blood.

SmartyBarrett said...

"You know who I blame? Metco gorillas!"