Thursday, December 17, 2009

Jacoby Ellsbury > Ricky Henderson; Adrian Gonzalez Kills Puppies

Apparently, right? At least that's what the yahoo Sox fans would lead you to believe, as detailed by HZMLS earlier. And now the media is getting in on it, too. Great.

/affixes FJM cap

Turning around and trading Ellsbury would result in a steal for Padres

A steal! I get it! I get jokes!

Obviously, we are sensing the proverbial next shoe is about to drop. If it is Adrian Gonzalez (with an outside shot at Miguel Cabrera), which would be a ginormous move by the Red Sox to cap what would be an eye-popping offseason, then what is there not to like?

Well if it's Miguel Cabrera I may have a few gripes, depending on whom they trade away, but if it's Gonzalez I'm all in. Seriously, just don't touch Daniel Bard and we're good. Make it happen.

Well, one thing: if one of the players going to San Diego is Jacoby Ellsbury.

No. No no no. Wrong.

If Ellsbury is the hot name from the San Diego side, then Theo Epstein should just say no.

If San Diego wants Ellsbury, I'll drive him out there myself. I'll pay for his plane ticket! Seriously, if he was the centerpiece, how ideal would that be?

Give up Ryan Westmoreland, and include a better prospect or two at the end of the deal.

A better prospect?!?! So the Sox should overpay when they don't have to?

"Hey Jed, it's Theo. Yeah, well, I know you want Jacoby, but we're sending Casey Kelly instead. ...PCP?, why?"

Ellsbury is a special player who hit .301, stole 70 bases, and scored 94 runs last season, and one who plays a very good center field and is just 26 years old.

Let's break that down:

1. Batting Average: .301
As we all know, batting average is a limited stat, but even so Jacoby held his own. .301 was the third-highest average among all MLB center fielders last year. I don't have any real gripes about his hitting for average.

2. Stolen Bases: 70
Not much more I can say. Amazing.

3. Runs Scored: 94
Completely meaningless. If he got on base every single time up and had 8 Yuniesky Betancourts hitting behind him, he'd finish the season with like 3 runs scored. Does that mean he sucks? Listen carefully: RUNS SCORED IS COMPLETELY A FUNCTION OF TEAMMATES. It has little or no bearing on one's individual skills at a player.

4. Center field defense: Very good.
Well this is just WRONG. Nick Cafardo just lied to you. There he is. Sitting at his desk. Typing lies. The sonofabitch. Please go to this and sort by "fielding." Yes, Jacoby Ellsbury was the worst defensive outfielder in the game last year in terms of run prevention. The absolute worst. Or check his UZR here. 3rd worst in the game. Atrocious would be an upgrade. He is KILLING the Sox in terms of his glove. That is a fact.

And while his on-base percentage in 2009 was a pedestrian .355, it was .388 in September and October.

Yes! Small sample size! Look what he did in two months! Amazing! Even though I'm admitting his OBP sucked in general (and PARTICULARLY for a leadoff hitter), I'll throw selective endpoints at you! Did you know his OBP on (the) Justin Upton's 22nd birthday is .600?!?! Look it up! Don't trade this man!

This is a guy you want in the lineup with Gonzalez.

OK, fine. I won't disagree with that, although I'm not a huge Ellbury fan and I think he is LARGELY overrated. But OK. If you can hang onto him, fine. But declaring him untouchable is just fucking foolish.

The Padres would need Ellsbury as a poster boy for their future. In enormous Petco Park, it would be a sign to fans that the philosophy is changing and that the Padres are going with speed and pitching.

And horrible defense.

While Gonzalez is the last piece of what could be a very good lineup, trading Ellsbury eliminates a tremendously important element - speed.

I've re-written this sentence:

"While Gonzalez hits a shit-ton of homers, doubles, gets on base, hits for average, mashes the ball, plays tremendous defense, and is one of the best all-around players in baseball, Ellsbury runs fast when he gets on base! (Which is admittedly not very often.)"

Ellsbury is one of the most exciting players in the game.

Kill yourself.

With Cameron, Ellsbury, and J.D. Drew, the Red Sox have significantly improved their outfield defense.

And if they replace Ellsbury with virtually anyone who can stand upright, they'll improve it even more.

Cameron is a three-time Gold Glove center fielder who could still play there.

And would be a fuck-ton better than Jacoby.

Instead of the decision being whether Cameron will play center and whether Jeremy Hermida or Xavier Nady (also on Boston’s radar) would be in left, the hope is that the final decision is whether Ellsbury should shift to left and Cameron should play center.

God yes.

The only consideration in such a move would be leg preservation.

No. The consideration should be "Holy fuck Mike Cameron is so much better defensively than Jacoby Ellsbury it's not even funny. Even dreaming of anything else should be outlawed in all 50 states."

Epstein is right to say he is not desperate. He should not be desperate enough to trade one of the best athletes in major league baseball.

Desperate? No, absolutely not. But when you have the chance to upgrade your offense AND your defense, you do it. Period. Don't give me this "best athletes" crap. He is an above average hitter, but doesn't walk nearly enough and therefore possesses a low OBP. He's a tremendous speedster but a horrendous defender. He's expendable. Any inflation of his skills is pure unadulterated homerism. If you need to trade him for Gonzalez you do. No fucking questions asked.

Adrian Gonzalez is really really fucking good.


HZMLS said...

72% of readers would not trade Ellsbury for Gonzalez. Sometimes I hate this town.

Zach Martin said...

Don't care if this is off topic. FUCK.
THE. BRUINS. Fuck the Bruins right in the chin.

HZMLS said...


If I actually gave a shit about hockey I would act offended.

nfsffw said...

Youk. Lester. Pedroia.
Those are the 3 players that shouldn't be considered in a trade for Adrian. Living in SD, I get to see him a LOT, and yes, he is all that. Jed won't make any friends by trading him, well loved local kid, and I have doubts Gonzalez actually wants to leave, but money's gonna make that decision for him. Buchholz and Elsbury, or either and a prospect or two would be a killer deal for the Sox. I wonder how many times Cafardo and all the numbskulls comprising the 73% have actually seen Gonzo play.