Monday, October 19, 2009

SAT Analogy Prep. - Courtesy of Mass Hysteria

As we get into the usual SAT months, many high school students may be panicking as they try to prepare for likely the biggest standardized test of their lives. But not to worry, kids. If you saw the Patriots 59-0 drubbing of the Titans yesterday, you should be able to follow along with this. Any of the below are suitable answers to the following analogy:

Patriots : Titans ::

The Harlem Globetrotters : The Washington Generals

Mark David Chapman : John Lennon

Cold Weather : Mark Sanchez's Career

Vomit : Jimi Hendrix

Peter North : Lacie Heart

Jack Daniels : An Unborn Fetus

MLB Steroid Testing : Bobby Abreu's HR Numbers

The Ramseys : JonBenét

Whole Wheat Toast : Smarty Barrett

Mike's Pastry Cannoli : GHABB,Y~!

Dave Henderson's HR : Donnie Moore

The US Military : Pat Tillman

A Book : A Florida State University Player

Rocket Booster Failure : The Space Shuttle Challenger

Derek Jeter : Really, you can't begin to measure the intangibles on this guy... I mean, if you were looking to define the word "leader", you'd have to start with Derek Jeter. Look at the way he approaches the plate -- can you think of a better example for young players? Just point at Derek Jeter, and say "That, son, is baseball. That is being a man." (contributed by Fox Sports)

A Weight Machine : Nancy Benoit

Yours in the comments!


ballamiguel said...

Matt Ryan's bodyguards : HZMLS

Reading MH : my chances of getting work done

Boston Red Sox: L.A. Angels playoff, crap. That one hurt.

HZMLS said...

Sabermetrics: Joe Morgan

nfsffw said...

Sweet Jesus, I love Mike's cannoli.

Oh, and Vin Scully : Joe Buck