Thursday, June 11, 2009

Profiles in Awesomeness: St. John's Prep Lacrosse

Normally I wouldn't care about high school sports, or lacrosse in general (I know its like hockey with a stick and a ball), but this story caught my eye. St. John's Prep is an all boys school on the North Shore, and a diploma from there usually is a shoe in to an Ivy League school, a trophy wife, and a job that allows them to boss around schlubs like me. Now my interest might have to do with the fact that I know one of the player's on the team very well, and he is basically the Tom Brady of the SJP LAX team, or it might be due to the fact that I grew up on the North Shore and the Prep was infinitely superior to my school's teams in just about every sport. Who knows? Enjoy this post though , it's probably the first one ever on Mass Hysteria that deals with High School sports.

Yesterday the Prep played Duxbury over at Harvard for the State Championship in Lacrosse. Honestly I have no idea where Duxbury is, or that Duxbury was even a town/city in Massachusetts until I heard about this game yesterday. It seems that Duxbury was to Lacrosse what the '50s Celtics were to Basketball, as in they won ALL THE GOD DAMN TIME. In fact before St. John's beat them earlier this year, they had won 99 in state games this year. Can you honestly imagine doing something well 99 times in a row? Hell I can't even get out of bed everyday for work on time, let alone 99 times in a row. Well long story short Duxbury was kicking the crap out of the Prep, when SJP made a miraculous comeback with less than a minute left, Dux was only up 1. Well everything sucked after that, a botched play left the Prep down and out and Suxbury got the win.

I would like to send a special cheers and beers to St John's captain John Jennings, who got the Jesus Shuttlesworth treatment all game, and still managed to score two goals and nail on assist.
"That guy just wouldn't even let me run with the ball," Jennings said."They just wanted to deny me the ball and have a guy run around with me. He stayed in my face and didn't let me get the ball."

Jennings worked as hard as Boston Celtics shooting guard Ray Allen does when trying to get open for a three-pointer. Like Allen, Jennings sprinted, juked and ran off screens trying to shake free."

See the difference is, when Jennings was triple covered he scored points and didn't completely disappear. John, if nothing else great happens to you in life, you can rest easily knowing that you were compared to Ray Allen. Greatest.honor.ever.


GHABB,Y~! said...

Moral of this story: Everyone who graduates from the Prep is fucking awesome. I speak from personal experience.

A Pimp Named DaveR said...

How many rapes were there?

The A-Train said...

wait, I'm confused:

John Jennings is like Tom Brady, but the sport he plays is like hockey with a stick and ball, and his performance was compared to that of a basketball player.

So uh...who is he like again? And wouldn't being compared to Larry Bird be the greatest honor for someone?

HZMLS said...

Sorry he is more like Tiger Woods, in that he is Mr. Clutch.