Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Breakfast with the Hysterics



So last night was a very uneventful night in Boston sports, and sports in general. No Monday Night Football, no Bruins, no Celtics. If my college hoops columns are capturing your attention at all, you may or may not have watched Georgetown hand UConn their first loss of the season last night. In the great lovely adequate state of Connecticut no less. The man-beast that is DaJuan Summers dropped 18 points and the Hoyas played some serious lock-down defense to secure the win. They also managed to do what no other team has been able to do this year - shut down Hasheem Thabeet, holding him to just four points on 2 of 4 shooting. He did however have 7 blocks in a solid defensive effort.

So if you haven't heard the rumors already - and I assume you have by now - your Boston Red Sox attempted to acquire Hanley Ramirez after losing out on Mr. Teixiera. When HzMLS sent me this link last night I almost fell out of bed. Then I looked at Hanley's numbers and almost shot my wad all over my computer screen. If I were a woman, these numbers would make me pregnant. If I were a pregnant woman, they would immediately induce labor. Seriously, like who do you want? Buchholz? Here. I'll drive Clay straight to Florida myself. Jacoby? Here. Want Mike Lowell back too? Here. I think the only person off-limits would be Jon Lester in a deal to acquire this guy, honestly. Give them whatever they want.

Question to the Sox fans: What would you be willing to give up to get Hanley? Or, maybe more accurately, what would you be unwilling to give up?

9 comments:

Raquel said...

Ellsbury and Buchholz? Done and done. Pedroia, Bay, and Papelbon are the only players on the team I'd be unwilling to let go.

Yes, I'd even say goodbye to Jed for him...

Hazel Maes Landing Strip said...

I WOOD NOT TRADE JASON VARITEK HE IS THE HART AND SOUL OF THIS TEAM.

Pepster said...

Marlins fan here - don't you dare try to take Hanley Ramirez. He is absolutely phenomenal. He should be the only untouchable on the Marlins roster.

SmartyBarrett said...

Mar-lins...fan?

Sorry, I don't understand.

Raquel said...

Ah, Pepster, I forgot!

I lust for Hanley Ramirez. He's actually on my Top 5 list of baseball hotties, believe it or not... and he can like hit and stuff too, I hear.

Recommended reading!

SmartyBarrett said...

He is seriously #2 on the list of offensive players I'd want to build a team around. #1 being Pujols.

Also, I agree with the untouchables list, Raquel. Perhaps me saying Lester is the "only" untouchable was a bit hasty.

Boatdrinks said...

So is this thing somewhat alive or dead as a freaking doornail?

The A-Train said...

Damnit! Stop making all of these solid, sensible moves! Wildly overpay for Derek Lowe or Oliver Perez! I DEMAND IT!

nfsffw said...

Untradeables are Bay, Pedroia, Drew, Paps, Papi, DiceK, Beckett, Lugo and Lowell. They come off the table just because they make too much money, and the only reason the Marlins will even consider trading Hanley is to not have to pay him $70 mil over the next 5 years. Youk's likely out of the mix too as he's up for a new contract soon. Loria's the cheapest bastard in baseball - fuck, their entire team made less than Manny last year.
I've got a hunch Lester's the key player Florida would want, probably with Ellsbury and Lowrie.
I'd do this and sign Sheets right away, and then I'd put on a full court press for free agent to be Matt Holliday in 2010.