Thursday, August 14, 2008

Hang On To Your Females, Boys....


He's on the loose now.

What does this have to do with the on-the-field baseball? Nothing. It's just pure gossip. But that's what I'm all about, dammit.

Frankly, I'm surprised that ANY baseball player's marriage lasts, ever. "Honey, I'm going to be on the road for six months, where every hot piece of tail over the age of 16 will be throwing themselves at me every night willing to do whatever sick, perverted thing I can think of just to say they were nailed by an All-Star" does not seem to be a strong foundation upon which to build a lifetime partnership. Call me crazy.

My completely unfounded speculation on the cause of this divorce: I'm sure Clay Buchholz's girlfriend has friends, don't you think?

10 comments:

The A-Train said...

Honey, I'm going to be on the road for six months, where every hot piece of tail over the age of 16 will be throwing themselves at me every night willing to do whatever sick, perverted thing I can think of just to say they were nailed by an All-Star

a woman who is in love with baseball players and pearl necklaces? sounds an awful lot like someone we all know...

futuremrsrickankiel said...

WHAT ARE YOU IMPLYING

Zach Martin said...

This is like whenever Dave Martinez would come back to Chicago...enjoy the cold showers, boyz...

The A-Train said...

that you're really looking forward to Tek's impending free agency? And yes, that was double entendre.

futuremrsrickankiel said...

Eh, Tek's not really my type...

Now Jarrod Saltalamacchia, on the other hand? Yow. That man's ass is absolutely unimpeachable.

Hazel Maes Landing Strip said...

Can I please assume his absolute horseshit hitting is due to problems at home a la JD Drew in '07? Please?

David said...

Amen HMLS. Finally, an excuse for sucking this year. I mean, who ever heard of a baseball player tanking during a contract year?

The A-Train said...

Andruw Jones has spent the past two seasons sucking ass. Yeah, this year isn't technically a contract year, but he's a Boras client. It seems like every year is a contract year for those guys.

Rocco said...

It says he filed for divorce. Which means she's the cheating slut.

Rocco said...

Oh, and damn you Clay! What, the no-no wasn't enough? You needed Penthouse tail to rub in it?