Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Boston Sports Tonight!

Red Sox v. Rays, 7:10 pm. Well shit. Not only did we, like, NOT beat the Rays yesterday, but there wasn't a single punch thrown or cleat to the groin. For shame! If I wanted to watch a good, clean exhibition of top-quality baseball, I'd be watching the AL Central dammit. AND I AIN'T WATCHIN' THE AL CENTRAL, BOYS. Tim Wakefield (5-5, 3.88) and Matt Garza (6-4, 3.74) square off tonight in Game 2 of this bafflingly meaningful series. Wakefield has historically dominated the Rays, which isn't saying much, but hopefully he'll continue to stymie the Tampa Bay hitting tonight or we'll be an ugly 2.5 games back in the division and I'll be even MORE cranky tomorrow than I was today. Garza is coming off a magnificent 1-run complete-game performance against the mighty Marlins bats, which according to my calculations [scribbles furiously on wall] means he will let up 5 runs on 8 hits over 5.1 innings tonight. Yes that's right. Also, it's only every so often that I have a chance to post pictures of Evan Longoria (last week's AL Player of the Week!), so indulge me.

Incidentally, a lot of people have been asking me what I think of this whole Manny Ramirez business. (Manny Shoving Old-Manny?) Honestly, I don't know what more can really be said about the incident. It was a jackass move by a man who is basically a gigantic coddled kid with little to no accountability for his actions when he's not swinging at a little ball with a big lopsided piece of wood. As a fan who has whole-heartedly bought into the whole "Manny being Manny" thing for years, I feel almost complicit in the whole thing, since I have no doubt that Manny's awareness of the behavioral blank check Boston fans have written him contributed to his poor display the other day. It's made me a bit ashamed. I'd like to see some sort of gesture on both his and the team's part to make amends, but I'm not really sure what that would ideally entail. I've never in my life shoved anyone hard enough to make them fall down (seriously, in elementary school I was always busy playing ponies and unicorns and making boys marry me at recess, and that probably would have been the only epoch in my life during which shoving someone would have made sense to me) and I just don't fucking get why a megamilliondollar star athlete would ever, ever feel like that was an appropriate level on which to communicate.

It's possible, of course, that the exuberant, playful Manny that delights me on the diamond is part-and-parcel with the mercurial Manny that loses his temper off it. To which I say: then fuck the pageantry. Shea Hillenbrand was a piece of shit and his ass got shipped out of here. I don't want to lose Manny as a player, but I'm also not going to entertain any idiotic notions about his being allowed to do whatever the fuck he wants being in some way endemic to Red Sox "team chemistry" or what have you. Man needs to act like a grown-ass man or face the consequences. Period. Boston has always delighted in its free-wheeling club atmosphere because it's so antithetical to the kind of ship El Steinbrenner runs down in the Bronx, but bad behavior is bad behavior no matter what kind of funky hairdo or endearing accent it may don.

Anyhoodle, in summary Tampa Bay sucks.

Frivolous prop bet of the night: A fan is ejected in the 4th inning for excessively heckling the bullpen; the fan is later revealed to be Coco Crisp.

Serious prediction of the night: Wake's been pretty schizo this year, but I feel like he'll go at least into the 8th tonight. The only Ray who's been able to consistently get to him in the past is Carl Crawford, and, well, fuck that guy*.

*just kidding, I actually really like Carl Crawford but this humidity and the 3-game losing streak are combining to make me CRANKY AS FUCK

(one more humor me)


A Pimp Named DaveR said...

o an he rookie?

Comicbook Guy said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Comicbook Guy said...

So, Here's the deal on Manny. For as long as I can remember, Pro Spurtz has been filled with children which we as fans tolerate untill someone "Mike Vicks" or in this case , Mannys. Lets be serious and say we are all complicit. Either accept that or fire his ass, NOW.

/it's just pathetic

Pepster said...

Perhaps when Longoria is no longer a rookie he will have enough money to go visit a dentist?

futuremrsrickankiel said...

/kills you