Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Breakfast With the Hysterics

It feels like a cheese blintz sort of day...

*Game Two of the Bronson Moss First Base Extravaganza went better than the first, as the Sox came back in the eighth to beat the D-Backs 5-4. Cap' Varitek broke out of a 1-31 slump with the deciding single, though a pessimist (or Rob Deer) would point out that he's now only 2 for his last 32. Chris Smith got the win, being the person with the most boring name to earn a win for the Red Sox since The Other Greg Harris. Pedroia hit his seventh homer, and is probably taking gorilla steroids. Captain Underbite Youkilis did return in the ninth as a defensive replacement, so Moss's days at first may have come to a close, though we'll remember them warmly.

*Last night was also Jerry Remy Night at Fenway, as they've apparently run out of players and now have to resort to dedicating a night to a guy with a career .328 SLG. Seriously though, congrats to Remy for 20 years in the booth, and congrats to his publicist, who hopefully worked out a deal for a percentage of Remy-related product profit. Remy's a lot of things, but at least he's entertaining as hell.

*Loudon may be in danger of losing one of their NASCAR races if they don't get a huge crowd this Sunday. And if those people don't have NASCAR races to go to, then they'll run amok in our cities and towns, poisoning our children with their jorts and inappropriate yells of "Daaaale." So please, if only for our children, go to Sunday's race. I won't be going, because, well, I walk upright and have visited a dentist in my lifetime, but please, by all means, you should attend.

*The Bruins re-signed DEF Mark Stuart to a two-year deal, at $1.3million per. The B's also traded for minor league defenseman Johnny Boychuck, (is that Yiddish?) who spent last year with Bret Hart's Calgary Hitmen. No word on whether he's a sharpshooter.


futuremrsrickankiel said...

Mark Stuart!


Rocco said...

1-31: .032
2-32: .063

I'll take 2-32 over 1-31 anyday.

Pepster said...

It isn't pronounced "Daaaale". It's "Juniorrrrrrrrr".

/sorry I know that.