Friday, June 27, 2008

Boston Sports Tonite!

Red Sox at Astros, 8:05 PM
It's "Fierce Historical Rivalries" weekend in The Abomination That Is Interleague Play!!!!! Mets/Yankees! Nationals/Orioles! Sox/Astros! The Sox begin an epic 10-game road trip tonight in Houston, once again placing their long-standing hatred of the oil industry and the space program in stark contrast with the Artists Formerly Known As The Colt .45s' long-standing support of English colonization and tea taxation. Expect at least 30 fans to be seriously injured in the resulting ruckus. Your pitching matchup tonight: Mothra (8-1, 3.46) vs. former Major League pitcher Runnymeade Runnydiarrhea RunDMC Runelvys Hernandez (0-0, 0.00), who was just called up from the minors after undergoing offseason Tommy John surgery.

Frivolous prop bet of the night: OH MY GOD -- THAT'S SHAWN CHACON'S MUSIC!!!!

Serious prediction of the night: Jerry Remy refers to Minute Maid Park as "Enron Field" at least once during the broadcast.

Coming tomorrow (probably): The Pimp's mid-season report on the Sox.

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