Monday, April 14, 2008

Trot Nixon wants you to keep your dick to yourself

So, I work at a Catholic Institution, in a role I will never disclose, in a location you will never know. Well, today they were previewing chastity and abstinence videos to show to the kids. The nun who was watching the videos needed help with the DVD player, so I went into the library and helped her set up one of the videos. As the chapter titles came up, I noticed the face of our favorite ex-Dirt Dog Trot Nixon, telling kids to wait until marriage before they copulate. So I did a little investigating. What I found was both hilarious, and kind of disturbing. There is a website of professional athletes who are telling kids sex isn’t cool. Not only is sex really bad, but its dangerous too!

“"Swimming in an alligator-infested lagoon may give relief from the heat but it is also very risky. Giving in to sexual impulses can be risky too."”

The website is very out of up to date, and has an extensive list of members including:

· Steve Howe
· Hershel Walker (only his religious personality)
· A litany of Tecmo Bowl QB’s including Phil Simms, Jeff Hostetler, Bernie Kosar & Frank Reich.
· Wellington Mara – unfortunately can no longer have sex

Kids if you are reading this post, you can listen to these athletes. Or you can take the advice of your favorite blogger and WRAP IT UP:

Photo courtesy of


Sh!tShow said...

Scooter McGruder!?!?! SCOOTER MCGRUDER?!?!? Odd, since whenver I heard his name, someone was fucking scoring.

A Pimp Named DaveR said...

I like that in the sidebar, thanks to my last post, it sort of reads "Dear Eric Wedge: Trot nixon wants you to keep your dick to yourself." Which really creates a vivid mental picture of what may be going on in the Cleveland dugout these days....

Hazel Maes Landing Strip said...

Thats pretty impressive that Wedge still wields that kind of power, even with Trot wallowing away in AAA ball for the D'Backs.