Wednesday, April 9, 2008

Local Women Prepare to Be Easy Lay for Patriots, Masturbation Fantasy for Bloggers

Potential Cheerleaders hold a pose that will be their bread and butter over the next year. Other parts of the routine including the braying donkey, the Lusty lean, and the Standing Tiger/Crouching Dragon.

Scores of beautiful women descended on Gillette Stadium to audition to be eye candy for every horny football fan in New England. Audition-ettes were judged by the coaches for overall jiggiliness, ability to hold a pose, and fullness of their lips . The final part of the audition included an application and a questionnaire. Luckily, Mass Hysteria got a hold of the application:
  • Do you oppose splitting touches with Lawrence Maroney and Sammy Morris?
  • If Randy wants some action, and gets a little pushy, will you promise to keep your mouth shut?
  • Tom needs to know, are you on the pill? And are you taking it regularly?

After years of practice, the girls are ready to make it in the "big time", as Matt Light salivates for fresh meat .

Pictures courtesy of

1 comment:

Sh!tShow said...

Sadly, I only miss on the lip thing.